our love lies in my heart

hearing your voice just comforts me...
it lets me know that you are doing fine.
i have missed u so much darling.
i hope u are missing and thinking of me every min too.

HK must be a fun place. though i've been there when i was younger.
i cant really rem where to shop, where to find nice things to eat.
where is romantic...i guess u noe where to find those places.
one day i will go visit you one day. be with u. lie by your side...
i wanna bear hug u like i used to. look at u when u fall aslp.

u look gorgerous u noe that? when u're aslp, when u're awake.
darling u just look great no matter where u are, what u wear,
in all ways u look great. i love u baby...i longed to see u.
i hope i can see u soon. i need to save money...and find the right time...
just wanna be with u alone baby...just the two of us.

missing you

My heart aches when I talk to you
My heart aches when I don’t hear from you
My heart aches when I long for you

I don’t know why
You’ve taken over my thoughts
I can’t explain

You’re still a stranger
Far away
I want you close by

I miss your embrace
Holding you close
My heart aches

I miss you!

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darling i want you more than you can imagine.
i might have tried to move on with life.
but truly i've missed you every min.
the poem speaks of whats deep down in my heart.
i wish you tell me how much you want me.
i wish you show me how much you love me still.

loving him and not forgetting

my last entry i tok abt my sucky life, my ex who cheated & my job which i lost.

this week i shall tok abt how complicated love is.
been tokin to m. finding out how he is...gt me into missing him more than i already did.
he called me in HK, i called once a awhile. so far actually only once.
he mentioned : " its a pity we have to end like this."
was it because of wad everyone say abt him that made me believe that everything i see
is true? im really confused. i love m, up till now i stil do. i cant forget him, dream of him,
miss him.
today he dedicated a song to me. and when asked what is the thing he remember of our
r/s, he answered. "u are like my hands , my legs and my mind.. u just know how to do everything to lessen my burden in anyway..." i melted.

sucks

life's getting so tiring that sometimes i just dun wish to live.
the whole week i've been drinking and drinking like no tomorrow.
terrible week, i week i wish i can forget.

found out m has been lying to me all the while. he has more than just one gf.
or one other gf. apparently i heard he has more than a handful.
i din want to believe abt maggie...my boss's cousin. heard m n her are together
but i choose to deceive myself. tues night...my smart boss gave me her number
and gave her my number as well. we smsed. she told me to go meet her at dungeon.
which was where m is at that time as well. i went down hoping to find out things for
myself too. and yes i did. they were abt to get up his car. he gt a shocked when he saw me.
pretended that i was drunk. pretended that me n him = nothing. he even asked him buddy,
mel to come out and get me away. and guess what....just half an hr before i went down dungeon,
he msged me "i love u". my heart was torn to see him drive off with her. BUT...maybe it
was a good thing i have too many ppl that dotes on me...n mel is one of them.
he told me many many things, m is just a player. i shall not get into details.
m is in HK now. good for me. dun have to see him. i heard he told others that me n him broke up
but i kept pestering him. n he mentioned abt sex. haa..irony how others can stil think he n i really
broke up...so y the sex huh?

anyway, fri...my boss gt back. found out from others that i made a commotion at dungeon that
night...but seriously i din scream nor anything...all i did...ask m what is goin on.
anyway he oso heard abt c....so i was questioned if i was with c. n i admited...
so there goes my job. i have to tender my resignation TODAY! but i have yet to find another job.
im happy with c right now. cayman cannot be any better...he stood by me when he noes abt m.
he stood by me when i cried over m.

so heres my shitty week. lost the one i love most, been with him for a yr to only find out he's
cheating on me all the while. lost my job coz i choose an agent as my bf. life really cannot suck any much more.