sweet love story

life has been pretty interesting. went out with the sec sch gals today.
tok alot, i mean as gals, wad else do u do but tok. haa. i had a great time with
them today. nice dinner, n tokin abt everything we can think of at esplanade.
too bad. no cam. hee. i bought a necklace that was on sales for myself.
nice yellow flower necklace. n oso sth for sumone. haa.

heading to sentosa tmr! i cant wait. the beach here i come! haa.
damn. i do not hav any beach wear with me now. but nvm.
i'll stil enjoy myself.
meeting a fren on sunday most slightly...hee. wow, plans made. hee.
im goin to bake brownies on mon! haaa. yummy yummy!
saved a slice of carrot cake for my mummy. hee. hope she will like it.
nette there one slice for u too! haha...i cant believe the cake is finished already.
argh. i wan more. haa.

juz finish watchin 'the story of us' dvd. nice. very touching. how that couple
save their marriage. its all abt compromising. so sweet. hee.
'n they live happily ever after'

yummylicious...

hmm...yummy! im bakin carrot cake! hee. first time in my life im actually
baking. its kinda fun! hee. smells really gd man...shall take a pic when its done!
hee. im eating hell alot more at my fren's place. SHIT. gonna get fat...time to
control myself n my stomach. hee.

honestly, i duno wad to blog abt. nothing much happening. hmmmmmmmmmsss.
till the next time i noe wad to blog. then i'll tok more. *roll eyes*
im reading the da vinci code now. its kinda interesting but so damn draggy....
i read a few pages i juz feel like skipping a few. its interesting to find out that the
olympics symbol was suppose to be the symbol for the goddess venus...but they
changed it a little so as nt to make it too obvious. hee.

sarah left yday night. due to one person.....i cant see her before she flies off.
gt kinda pissed if i may say so...wadeva. hey sarah, the next time u come back,
we shall go out again alright! study hard n play hard back in aussie! we can tok on
msn! hee.

its juz a facade

many things hav happened lately...which i do not wish to explain too much.
17th feb (fri):
went to sch to attend a talk. then head home n then to MOS for tracy's birthday.
18th feb (sat):
told nette take over me to play then went blah blah....skip the stupid details.
went coffee with serene. then dinner with her parents n mark. head to her place
to use the toilet urgently. then went elaine's place. toked to her abt many things
im goin thru. she prayed for me. felt alot better.
19th feb (sun):
went church. then lunch with a whole grp of them at taka. then took a cab together
with joey n nette to joey's place where he went runnin up his hse to take things, then
to nette's hse! they bought this toy gun thingy at paragon toyrus. haa. so funny. but it
hurts when the stupid ping pong ball hits u. we watched 'catch me if u can'. damn its boring
i tot its suppose to be funny. wad a dissapointment. haa.
click on the photo below to see the whole album!

20th feb (mon):
stay home n do housework day.
i wun be home for the next few days for mayb a week.
im stil contactable though. hee. take care peeps. love u all.

how do i live without u?

How do I get through one night without you
If I had to live without you
What kind of life would that be
Oh I, I need you in my arms
Need you to hold
You're my world, my heart, my soul

If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything good in my life
And tell me now

How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live

Without you, there'd be no sun in my sky
There would be no love in my life
There'd be no world left for me
And I, oh Baby, I don't know what I would do
I'd be lost if I lost you
If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything real in my life
And tell me now

How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live

Please tell me baby
How do I go on

If you ever leave
Baby you would take away everything
Need you with me
Baby don't you know that you're everything good in my life
And tell me now

How do I live without you
I want to know
How do I breathe without you
If you ever go
How do I ever, ever survive
How do I
How do I
Oh, how do I live

how do I live without you
how do I live without you baby
how do I live....

season of unloved.

honestly, i feel so unloved. its the season of love. but i feel like im nt loved at all.

this is sth i gt frm wad karen wrote...i think its so true.
"But since it has been around for as long as we ever know, we don't have to look at it with skepticism. At least not that much.. Is that so much harm to show someone you love a little bit more? I have heard people rant on about how silly this day is and how it doesn't mean anything. Yet all around, people smile sweetly with the flowers and gifts they hold in the hands. Don't get me wrong, love is not measured by flowers and showering of gifts. But this day can be the day where you do an extra thing for your lover. A surprise bouquet, a single rose makes someone's day. Well, I don't know anyone who receive flowers everyday. If i can bring an extra smile to the person i love today, why not?

But gifts are just materials. Sometimes all a girl ever need is a compliment, a "thank you for all your love", a card or a whispered "I Love You". It's a special day for the emotion we call love. Of expressing it and feeling loved."

i dun need gifts to noe u love me. i only wish to hear u say u love me. call me ur dearest.
seems like u wun. n nv will. u're nt willing to say it. u're nt willing to show any love or
show that u cared for me. each day i cry myself to slp.

y is this gal cryin alone at the train station on vday?
y does she looks so upset n dissapointed?
i guess that muz be wad sum ppl muz be thinkin yday night.
wads the point of getting myself all pretty up?
hoping to get sum love frm him. by the end of the day, all the time i spend wanting this night to
be romantic juz went into thin air. no present nvm. but i dun even hear 'i love u dear' or
'happy valentine's day dear'. nothing. absolutely NOTHING.
i controlled my tears the whole night. acting like im ok when im nt.
the moment i step out of the car, tears juz flowed like theres no end to it, all the way home.

like as if feeling out of his life nt enough, now im feeling like im no longer loved.

a break....taking a break solves nothing at all. but it seems like hes enjoying it...
all the time, every single time, its him who wants it. wads the point of avoiding it by taking
a stupid break? n so wad if we get back together? the problem is stil there. coz he nv
wanna tok abt it. coz he avoids all of it. wad i need to say, i've said. if u love taking breaks
so much n u stil refuse to hav a gd talk to solve all our problems. this taking break shit will
come back. everytime. few months ago we had a break, so wad? now? u wan it again? is it
so fun? if u dun feel the hurt i do!
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Congratulations Mildred, you are...
You may seem sweet on the outside but behind you hide a sharpened claw. You have the observation skills of a forensic detective and can see right through people easily. You attract attention, both good and bad, but more bad than good. You've seen more assholes in life than a proctologist. The bad ones tries to screw you over but quickly learnt that its a bad move because you enjoy screwing them back accordingly.
take the quiz
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went sentosa with chelle n rah on the 13th feb...nice weather. though it got alittle cloudy after
like 2 n a half hrs of tanning...it was fun n we three finally met up! hee.
i really enjoyed my time there with them busking in the sun, baking myself.
n im suffering frm sunburn on my back now! OUCH!
after that we went to eat at pasta mania in harbourfront then head to city hall.
initially wanna go suntec but we end up goin esplanade. hee.
three girls goin crazy over oldies. singing really loudy. im sorry for the ppl there.
hahahhaa. their ears arent spared. hahaha. went simpang to meet the guys for dinner/our supper?
hahaha. yeah. tot was only kenny n paul. nv did i expect to see cal there.
i din eat, juz drank ice teh. the sad part is....i din feel well when we leaving. that i almost
puke in the cab! n i did the moment i step out of the cab. no idea wads wrong, or wad
i ate wrong. but i felt better after puking everything out n resting at cal's place.
nice of him to make hot herbal tea for me n hugging me making me feel really comfortable.
thank u.

Especially for U...... *from maymay*

Always stay happi n cheerpy my dearie.. i'm always there for u... Happi Valentine's Day

Mani Huggles.. *maymay*

*ps: posted not by mildred.. but by mi.. may!*

stupid life of mine

sumtimes he make me cry
sumtimes he make me smile
sumtimes he breaks my heart
sumtimes he mend it back

wad do u get when happy times r over?
wad will happen when u no longer love the other?
wad will happen when u finally gave up?

tears...r they meant to flow when u're sad or happy?
even tears duno themselves.
coz they cant be controlled.
when emotions tell u to cry u cry.
but did it occur to u that,
sumtimes when u feel the need to cry out....
but u juz cant cry,
tears juz refused to flow.

sum ppl say love is blind.
is love really blind?
mayb it is, but only for awhile.
only for the times when u're happily in love,
that u cant see any faults in the other.
wad if happy times r gone?
is love stil blind?
or do u open up ur eyes to see clearly.
is it stil so-called love?

wad is love? i feel like i no longer am able to answer that question.
for the two person i loved dearly,
broke my heart the most.
i feel dumb, i feel stupid. to allow myself to be hurt over n over again.
i juz feel like goin to sumwhere i duno anyone. mars? moon?
i juz wanna be alone. i dun wanna be hurt again.
i hate to mend my broken heart so many times.
i hate to cry.
i hate to be unable to control my feelings.

y is it the man i love most always wanna hurt me?
y is it he always wanna break my heart?
how many times does he wan me to mend this broken heart?

im so tired. so tired of many things.
i hate my life.

long passed cny...

a collage i did with sum of the pics from cny.
i noe its long past. heh but i was damn lazy to blog.
so here it is now.

wishes

someone said in his blog that he's never ever loved but merely needed.
i think i should be the one saying this 'im never ever loved but merely
there when needed.'
heck abt today. it was nice havin sumone else there though ur very own bf
hecked abt u. it was nice crying out all the unhappiness kept in my heart today.
sitting alone at national lib wasnt that bad.

dreams...r they meant to be fulfilled? wads the price to pay to fulfill it?