i am an idiot

y do i even bother trying to work this r/s out with someone who doesnt want to?
y do i even bother caring for someone's feelings when he doesnt care abt mine?
y do i even bother trying to say anything when he thinks i have no rights to say?
y am i loving someone so much that i just wanna be with him and make this r/s last?
y am i so stupid? y cant i just let it go?
y cant i let go of someone that doesnt need me at all?

loving someone isnt it suppose to do things together n stay with each other thru everything?
y do i feel like im the only one who want this to last?
all he thinks is "wad ifs" that doesnt exist nw...then wad if u dun wanna try committing and u end up losing someone u love? it doesnt matter to you does it? work then gd lor if nt nvm lor. how do u even expect sth to work when u dun wish it does coz u dun wanna try to make it work.

y cant i just let it go? maybe i should try to fuck care too. maybe i can let out someday.
i feel like such a fool to believe in love. it doesnt exist does it?

i am an idiot!